Making sure that your secret affair remains a secret is (obviously) the most important aspect of this type of covert relationship.
But sometimes thatís easier said than done.
If your spouse or committed partner discovers this affair, it can be detrimental to your relationship and cause rifts that can never be overcome.
So youíve got to take some precautionary measures from day one of your secret affair to make sure that you cover your tracks and donít get caught.
Unless you and your spouse work completely opposite work shifts or are living far apart at the moment, youíre going to have to make up some excuses to get away and see your new secret lover.
Make sure that for those times where you are stealing away to be with your lover, you have a solid alibi that youíve prepared in advance and practiced out loud.
Especially if your spouse becomes suspicious, he or she may start zapping you with questions about where you were and what you were doing at odd times, trying to force you to slip up and tell the truth.
But if youíve prepared your story, practiced telling it, and planned for questions about it, you will be able to smoothly explain where youíve been without raising any red flags.
Get Out Of Town
It might be super easy to take your new lover down the street to your favorite pizza joint or even back to her apartment on the other side of town, but you never know who might see you together, especially if you stay in your own geographical zone.
Even if you think youíre being really sneaky and visiting private places within town, you really can never be sure.
And with surveillance cameras and cell phones everywhere, thereís no telling who might catch you on film.
So get out of town with your lover, even if you both live in the same town.
Itís worth the 30 minute drive to have the peace of mind that comes with knowing you wonít accidentally run into your wifeís best friend at the mall or have your husbandís buddy see you in the parking lot somewhere.
Plus, the distance adds separation to the relationship emotionally as well, as youíre not mixing up memories and emotions that are tied to physical locations with both your spouse and your secret relationship partner.
From day one, you need to be 100% transparent with your secret lover regarding the level of discretion that you require from them.
If they can only call between 9pm and 10pm on your second cell phone on Tuesday nights, or whatever it may be, that has to be clear from the start.
And you also want to clarify the level of relationship that you are looking for.
If itís just passion, let them know.
If itís a deeper, emotional relationship, let them know.
But do this from the start so that there arenít hurt feelings later.
Those hurt feelings can lead a jaded lover to turn you in as revenge.
Even by stating what you want up front this other person still holds power over you and situation, but you can be much more confident that you wonít be ratted out by this lover.